Healthy couples see themselves as strong individuals, but they find that being a couple makes them happier. They believe that by acting together they are stronger than they would be as separate individuals.

They share power. Sometimes one partner takes charge, and sometimes the other, depending upon who is more suited for the situation.

They are not afraid to quarrel because they have the confidence that their relationship can survive occasional outbursts.

They try to take a positive attitude toward conflicts. When interests diverge or clash, they negotiate a solution that benefits the couple, without taking the attitude that one person is giving up something for the sake of the other.

They accept the facts that there will be some areas of disagreement, and they try to live with these differences.

They give each other some independence and privacy, allowing each other to have outside friendships and activities without jealousy.

They take interest in each other's jobs and activities.

One person does not fear that the other will change. In fact, they view personal change as good for the relationship because it keeps things interesting.

Their personal relationship is independent of their relationships to their parents and children. They do not allow their feelings for other family members to govern their personal relationship.

They share all emotions, sorrow as well as happiness.

They don't assume that life has to be rosy all the time.